This post would have been published two or three weeks ago, if I could’ve found the picture I wanted for this blog sooner. I located it this week in a tote of personal items, nestled among other random pictures of weird stunts I did in years gone by.

In my searching through old photo albums, nostalgia hit me full force.  20 years ago, I was teaching school and living life full blast. I loved humor and a good joke, of which I compiled my own joke book. (No it’s not published, ha ha.) I created skits and acted them out on my own, after making my audience promise they would laugh at me so I wouldn’t feel stupid. (Trust me, there were some lame ideas coming forth).  My audience typically consisted of neices and nephews, my siblings and spouses, and my parents.

Musing over the fun-loving girl I used to be, brought a sense of sadness. I wish I could still be like that! In rare moments when I feel reeeeaaaalllllyyy good, the me of long ago pops up. Now days, I’m wrapped in the trenches of raising a family, having a baby this year, sleep deprivation, combined with physical and mental health challenges, doesn’t leave much space for lightheartedness. My life *feels hounded by difficulties. It takes the whole of my brain to focus on necessities, so there’s nothing left to exert to humor. (*not saying it actually is. I think it’s more feeling like it)

Then there’s energy needed for our children who need constant training and guidance. Plus the burden I carry that they’d grow up to see their need of Jesus. Life is hard. And I want them to realize and accept that life isn’t always fairness and fries, dished out with hot fudge sundaes. Can I blame my melancholy nature for the pessimism I’m feeling? Are these burdens, mid-life weights coming on? Could someone please identify with me?!

Set me straight. Yes, God is good. All the time, God is good! Life in my stage is a blessing, and I am thankful for my family!

It wasn’t that I didn’t have trials when I was young, it’s just that now I feel covered up with heavier responsibilities and cares of life,  that there’s no extra mental space for friviolarity. Possibly, there’s maturity thrown in there somewhere too. But back to the girl I used to be….

When I was in my upper teens and early twenties, I wrote poems right and left.  Sometimes they came together without much effort. Often, they came out of heart struggles or messages I heard. As you can tell by the one in this post, I wrote some with less than profitable content.

My dad bought this Chevy S10 truck for me to drive when I was teaching school. It was a stick shift, which was excellent for me to learn how to operate. Yes, I stalled it more than once, and yes, I learned how to squall tires- on purpose! I was glad I learned straight stick driving because the VW I bought when I was 22 was also a manual. But by then I was comfortable with driving a stick.  And yes, here’s shocking truth; I used to drink pop and loved Dr. Pepper! Shivers! Or wait, maybe if I’d start drinking Dr. Pepper again my problems would disappear?!

      My Truck And I

My little old truck and I

  We go whizzin’ and sailin’ by

Past the slow folks that creep along

  I hit the gas as I sing a song

Shiftin’ gears and grindin’ some

  folks proly think “boy she’s dumb!”

But who cares- I don’t give a rip

  I get my Dr. Pepper and take a sip!

Sometimes a wild streak gets in me

  I slow to a stop and breathe deeply….

Then I mash the gas and turn the wheel

  Spin the tires and listen to the squeal!

Then I sit back and try to calm down

  And drive more carefully when I’m in town

In good looks, my truck ain’t got much for it

  But I ain’t driving a truck on credit

We get along good without a guy

  My little old Chevy truck and I!

I wrote this 4 or 5 years before I met Jerald. And 20 years later, I DO NOT get along good without my guy!! I love him like crazy for so many reasons. His kind, stable, God-fearing, forgiving heart melts mine to puddles. 

Here’s my VW bug I had next. Ladybug and daisy seat covers were 100% my style! I loved my bug and made lots of great memories with it. We also used it on our wedding day! ♥️